Whenever I shoot a wedding and the newlywed's coverage has ended I make it a point to go around to each member of the wedding party to get a feel from them as to how the experience was for them.

Most importantly, I speak with the Bride's parents and get feedback from them.

The Bride's Mom (and everyone else) at my last wedding was extremely happy with everything and couldn't say enough about what a great job I did. She asked me for business cards and told me she would definitely recommend me to her friends.

For whatever reason, the Bride and her Mom had a falling-out since the wedding a few weeks ago...that was unrelated to the wedding or to me.

The Mom contacted me because she wants to purchase some photos from the wedding. However, when I delivered the proofs to the Bride, she told me she does NOT want her Mom to be able to buy any of the photos.

Now I'm not sure what to do.

The wedding is over. The Bride has her proofs and tells me she is going to order enlargements (still looking through the proofs) and she's going to refer me to her friends.

The Mom tells me she is going to refer me to her friends.

What should I do? I don't want to anger the Bride cause then she may not purchase enlargements (or worse) she won't refer me to her friends.

If I don't sell prints to the Mom, I will anger her, and she won't refer me to her friends.

So, do I sell the prints to the Mom (because that is what I am in business for) or do I honor the Brides wishes and take it as a loss.

Either way, I stand to loose some referrals and make someone angry. I'm just not sure what's the right thing to do. I have never been in this situation before. Help! ANYONE!

If this is a business then treat it like one by honoring whatever your written agreement is. You obligation was successfully met by capturing the wedding and delivering the packaged agreed upon to the bride. I wouldn't allow her to control who I sell to. What if she gets into an argument with her siblings and grandparents next? She cannot deny the parents from getting photos. I'm sure the parents have other sources ( from other cameras present) to get photos from the wedding. Explain to the bride that she has put you in an extremely difficult situation and your goal is not to offend or anger anyone, however, this how you earn your income. Apologize to her for any hard feelings and encourage her to make referrals based on the quality of your work and not your handling of her domestic affairs.

At least for myself, I would say that you have to honor the bride. I am assuming that she is the one that paid for your services, besides she is the one to most likely spend more money with you anyways. Family battles can be messy and if I were you I would stay out of it. Besides, I would guess more of the brides friends are going to be getting married than that of the mothers.

Natalie

Thanks! I'm on the fence on this. In one sense I agree with Tony in that I AM in the Business of selling Photography so I should sell them to the Mom. On the other side, I agree with you Natalie. More of the brides friends are getting married (specifically the MOH and one of the bridesmaids) both next year! Of course, that doesn't guarantee that I'm going to get the jobs (I shouldn't count my chickens yet- right?) But I'm leaning more to the fact that the bride has more single friends than the Mom does.

Still unsure, but thanks to you both for your input!

Aloha!

Here's my 2 cents...Who hired you? In my opinion, that's the one who has the say on who has a right to purchase photos from you. If the bride hired you, not the father of the bride, (unusual), then she has a right to either give you permission, or deny you permission to sell the photos to anyone else.

I think of it as a portrait job in the sense that I wouldn't sell portraits I made of you to anyone but you! Could create release litigation.

I see your point Stan. I wouldn't want my photographer to sell portraits of me at a Flea Market unless I gave my consent. The fact that the person who wants to buy photos is the bride's Mom shouldn't matter. I should still get the consent of the bride and groom before I sell photos of them.

Thanks for that. This is why I enjoy being on these forums!!!

There's always several ways to look at things.

I am going to contact the bride and let her know of her Mom's request. If she is still mad at her and won't let me sell her photos then so be it.

Thanks everyone for your input!

Ed